Thom: the parentheticals are the background singersThom: Today we salute you Ms. Insurance salesperson,
Armed with only an amortization table and a calculator
You don't hesitate to tell us when we're worth more dead than alive (kickin' the bucket)
P&C, health, auto, whatever our insurance needs, you're there to make sure our mistakes don't cost us a dime (rewarding incompetence)
Sure, your premiums are outrageous and your policies full of loopholes,
but you always make sure to stick it to the owner of that Geo that rear-ended us in the parking lot. (oooohhh my neck) So raise an elbow, mistress of the master policy, for if it wasn't for you, our whiplash would go uncompensated.